I had an interesting struggle a month or so ago that has resulted in a fair amount of growth. I am still learning from this experience and I am feeling just how real the battle is here on Earth. I am sure I will progressively share bits and pieces of the things that I am learning but for now I want to share what I've realized about the importance of the condition of the hearts of men.
In the scriptures we often read of the hardness of hearts. When our hearts are hard, or doubting, the Lord is unable to etch His truths upon them. When our hearts are hard it is difficult if not impossible for us to walk by faith, or to feel the spirit. Without the spirit, our discernment of truth is left only mental which makes us very easy to deceive by "the philosophies of men mingled with scripture." Multiple scriptures tell us that people miss out on having the mysteries of the kingdom revealed because of the hardness of their hearts. (two good references on that are 1 Ne 15:11 and Alma 12:10)
This past week I watched the Joseph Smith movie that they show downtown. I was impressed with how believing he was. When he read, "If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God," he believed it and he believed, nothing doubting, that the Lord would answer him. I believe this is what the Lord refers to when he tells us to become like little children, to become BELIEVING. Children trust what we teach them, nothing doubting. When we TRUST the Lord to speak to us, when we trust him to let us know through the spirit of the truth of all things, he can, and he will.
I remember 10 or more years ago, during a time when I was "spiritual and not religious," I had a friend whose husband used to be LDS and left because he never got an answer as to whether or not the Book of Mormon was true. He had become quite bitter and anti. I don't know the condition his heart was in when he was seeking for a witness of the Book of Mormon, but I believe that to not receive an answer, his heart must not have been teachable. I have learned that the Lord does want us to walk by faith. He wants to teach us the truthfulness of all things line upon line and when we are ready to receive them.
If we want to learn why it is important to pay tithing, the first step is to pay it. Test the Lord. While you are paying it, and acting in faith that you trust the Lord to teach you, seek, study and pray. I had a few questions recently and I went about getting the answers a little backwards. I pondered a lot, and I wanted Joseph Smith to appear and tell me everything he knew that he didn't reveal to the church. I wanted the whole picture all at once, as much as I could get. Somewhere in the process I lost my believing heart and I lost the spirit. I have now learned that the process to receiving answers is believing the Lord can and will teach you, acting in faith, studying scriptures, searching words of prophets and praying. There are too many spirits abroad in the earth to depend on personal revelation alone. (more on that in another post! :) )
When I hit rock bottom with everything, I asked for a Priesthood blessing that told me the Lord would answer all of my questions "line upon line," and that I was to "hug close to the trunk of the tree close to the roots." I started going about my seeking in a different way. I sought out the words of Joseph Smith on the topics I was pondering, I searched in the scriptures, I prayed and I went to the temple once a week for a few weeks in a row. I really felt in the temple that my ability to RECEIVE truth had diminished. I would hear something and my mind would start working on it so much that my heart didn't even have an opportunity to FEEL anything about it.
I have found the greatest way to get the spirit back into your life is through reading the scriptures. You may meditate, you may pray, you may read other enlightening books, and you may feel great love for people, but without the foundation of scripture study, the spirit will likely leave and great truths that you may learn can easily become slightly skewed by the philosophies of men. I like to think I am pretty energetically aware and there is a special grounding and wholeness that comes from including scriptures in your spiritual practice. The scriptures are the main element that helped fix my heart. It wasn't instant, and I'm not overwhelmed with the spirit every time I read, but consistently reading scriptures seems to do more than any other one thing for getting and keeping the spirit.
Be believing.
3 comments:
I loved what you wrote about scriptures. I believe in the power of the Book of Mormon, too! I also loved your thoughts on becoming teachable. It definitely takes more work to become teachable than one may think. It's an active process. Your post made me think of JS when he said, "..a man would get nearer to God by abiding by its precepts, than by any other book."(referring to the BOM, obviously) It's not reading a line that makes a huge change, but reading consistently and doing what you read....then slowly but surely I find myself a little more patient, a little more aware of the Spirit, a little stronger, etc. Thanks for a great testimony and reminder!!
Thanks for yours too Mandy--Love ya!
Good stuff, Am! Something that came to my mind while reading it (read it about 3 times) was that list or chart about how to determine whether or not we have the Holy Ghost with us. Remember that? I know I have it somewhere--but in Draper. The one that says something like 'feel happy' on the side of "HAVE the Holy Ghost", and says 'feel sad, depressed' on the side of "DO NOT HAVE the Holy Ghost with us." Anyway--I'm sure you remember the paper I'm talking about. Your observation about how you felt in the Temple about not feeling able to receive truth, once again--made me think about actually having the Holy Ghost with us and how the Holy Ghost testifies to us of truth. Which yes, in order to have that gift we must not have 'hard hearts.' Not that you don't understand about the Holy Ghost--I know you do. I noticed also that SEVERAL talks from October Conference discuss a lot of things about the Holy Ghost that are really interesting--most of which I already knew--but a few I didn't. Something Elder Bednar said that struck me was
"Praying, studying, gathering, worshipping, serving, and obeying are not isolated and independent items on a lengthy gospel checklist of things to do. Rather, each of these righteous practices is an important element in an overarching spiritual quest to fulfill the mandate to receive the Holy Ghost. The commandments from God we obey and the inspired counsel from Church leaders we follow principally focus upon obtaining the companionship of the Spirit. Fundamentally, all gospel teachings and activities are centered on coming unto Christ by receiving the Holy Ghost in our lives."
Anyway....sorry so long....you're making my brain work! ; )
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